Friday, April 22, 2011

Ajeeb Amar ki Gazab Kahani

Amar Singh is a real clown. He imagines he is on a comeback trial. He was all over the television channels yesterday. This time he has found himself a brand new brother in Digvijay Singh. Together they held a press conference to discredit Shanti and Prashant Bhushan. And Singh forgot he was implicating himself as a patron of corruption when he decided to bell the Bhushans. I think the man is beyond caring now. All he wants to do is to claw back into public consciousness. He has met the predictable end of all fixers who outlive their purpose. They make the mistake of believing they have formed deep enduring bonds with those who they service. But once they have served their purpose, they turn into embarrassments for the very same folks they were on backslapping terms with. Like in the case of Singh, the Bachchans who never tired of acknowledging that Singh was family were quick to dump him no sooner did he have a fall out with his political mentor Mulayam Singh Yadav.

A couple of years ago we had a journalist from Lucknow visiting us. She had me in splits over stories of Amar Singh. Apparently he had this palatial house built for his good friend Jaya Prada on the banks of Gomti. Whenever they are in Lucknow, they are found in the balcony of this ‘Taj Mahal,’ soaking in the sunset. The whole thing sounded like my favourite fairy tale- Beauty and the Beast.

Singh is a born entertainer. He has even acted in a Malayalam film with Dimple Kapadia. Imagine the man keeps on getting humiliated and snubbed in public by someone or the other be it Sonia Gandhi or Jaya Bachchan or Mulayalam Singh Yadav. And then he gets to spend time with the most beautiful women in the country. I guess life always finds a way to compensate. The journalist also told me that there are these ‘Amar Chalisas’ available in UP. They are a bit risqué but very entertaining. If anyone has a copy, please mail it to me. I am dying to read it and since I am an adult I am allowed to.

Singh is in good company when he decides to give himself more importance than he deserves. Arvind Kejriwal, Kiran Bedi and Santosh Hegde are faring no better. What is all this nonsense about the government trying to discredit them and how hurt they are by the whole thing? They opted to take on the responsibility of framing the bill. Surely they weren’t naive enough to believe that they can take on the establishment and the system will respond with a lot of grace. They should get real and get on with doing the job they are meant to do. We all have skeletons in our cupboards and no one is naive enough to believe that the members of the civil society as they like to refer to themselves are an exception to this rule. They should stop throwing these silly tantrums. Besides they are just going to be drafting a bill. No one has empowered them to do anything more. For that they have to go and fight an election and win without bribing the electorate. It’s as simple as that. And the Bhushans should be replaced in the committee by some young and upright lawyers. Maybe someone who has just graduated from the National Law School and has all the legal knowledge to make a valuable contribution. By being rigid on this, they are just mirroring the behaviour of the politicians they oppose. Bas...bahut ho gaya. Ab kaam karo. Press conferences mat karo.

If I am sounding irritated, it’s because of this new Tanishq advertisement that has Amitabh and Jaya Bachchan in it. They are terribly affected...even more cloying than they were in Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham. I hope it’s not one of those sequel kind of ads where Abhishek and Aishwarya would also make an appearance at a later date.

If that happens I will definitely smash my television set.

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